Monday, August 22, 2011

Online Dating...The Crypt Keeper

I know it sounds awful but this dude ...

Well, let me start from the very beginning...I want you to know that I am an equal opportunity dater...what do you mean, dear Lols, you say? Well, I mean I do not discriminate. I don't care about Race, creed, age whatever!! I'm all about your brain and how much mental stimulation I get from being around you.

So this dude was the next guy to chat me up online, almost at the same time as the Chef; his profile read like an ad, so I googled him. I found some other website he had previously been on with the same photos from four years back. I asked him about that and his explanation seemed somewhat logical so I kept communicating with him. We decided to take the conversation from the computer to the phone and every time we spoke, he sounded very professional, that should have been my second clue. My first clue should have been his age but I just told you, I'm an equal opportunity dater.

He finally got the courage to ask for a meet; I accepted and we planned to meet at a local coffee shop. Let me tell you that this guy was always very polite, always very respectful, I was really taking a liking to him and could not wait to meet him.

On the day we were to meet, I had a date with the Chef too, one of the dates that he cancelled on, I was actually cool with him cancelling cause I wondered how I could blow-off TCK if I ended up having a really good time with the Chef but thanks to his royal flakiness, I didn't have to.

So time to meet up, I got there and he looked much older than his photos but not too too bad to where he needed a good telling off. We sat down at a table for two and that's where it all came crashing down...cue the jeopardy countdown music, crickets, any thing that conjures up awkward silent moments; I tell you, I believe I did that nodding-off-quick-wake-up thing many times...It was an epic disaster.

I looked at my bare wrist and wished I had a watch sitting on it, so I could say, oh look, is that the time, I really need to get going? In the end, I couldn't take the boredom anymore, after twenty minutes of talking about how I loved treesI really am fascinated by them but this guy was not giving me anything to work with, I told him I had some work to finish up and needed to leave.

He walked me to my car, I stretched out my hand for a shake, he ignored and hugged me, that was uber weird; I said good night and took off to the land of the living.

Strike two!

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